Monday, January 9, 2017

Divorce parties - general thoughts.

In this blog I would like to talk about divorce parties. Divorce parties are still considered to be a contradictory subject, even though they are becoming more and more popular as time passes by. It also might sound weird for a wedding planner to speak of such a subject. I love organizing any types of celebrations and parties, and I personally find the idea of a divorce party to be a good way to celebrate the beginning of a new life.

I don't believe there are people out there, who would dream about their divorce and anticipate it. Unfortunately, not everyone of us have the luck of meeting their "one and only" on the first try, moreover to marry him or her. Sometimes people get married too young, too soon, too excited to actually see who they are marrying. Sometimes circumstances lead to a loving couple separating. Whatever the reason for a divorce might be, it is not a pleasant time for those getting it. This is why, when the time a right, a divorce party is a good way to leave the bitterness of the separation behind.

In my opinion, a divorce party is a great way to celebrate the transaction into your new life. It is not mean, it is not shallow, it is not meaningless. The same way we could celebrate our leaving from a job we hated, or that we finally decided to move from a house that didn't quite suit us, celebrating the end of an unhappy marriage is a great way to start your new life on a happy note.

Divorce parties are not meant to get nasty about your ex spouse, say bad things about him or her, burn his or her stuff and be generally mean to a person you used to love and be in love with. It is meant to have a good time with close friends, and even family, if they don't mind attending such a party. It is a reason to have fun, dance, create positive memories to replace the sad ones.

As I see it, a divorce party is not a way to get over your ex spouse, but a way to celebrate that you have finally gotten over him or her and ready to start your new life. I don't believe it is a good idea to make the party a week after you decided to separate, as you probably won't feel really excited at that point. As a rule, break ups are followed by sad thoughts, a reminiscing of the love you used to have. Taking all those negative emotions and mixing them up with alcohol consumption, will most probably have disastrous results. As mentioned above, the divorce party is meant to celebrate your new life, not cry over the life you used to have. Better wait until you are over the break up to throw such a party.

Some divorces end in good terms, and the ex-spouses remain good friends. Just because you couldn't make it as husband and wife, it does not mean you shouldn't stay good friends. If this is your case, and if you both feel comfortable with it, you could even have the divorce party together. This way you will be able to show your common friends that you are in good terms, and that there won't be a reason for them to feel weird when hanging out with either of you.

It is not a good idea to have your children attending the party, regardless of their age. Even if you ended up your marriage in perfectly good terms with your ex spouse, it is still a traumatic experience for your children and they won't understand this celebration. Arrange for them to stay at their grandparents or any other relative, and have fun without them.

To sum up, I believe that divorce parties are a good way to celebrate your new life, and a good excuse to have a fun evening full of positive emotions and memories after a sad period of your life Have a gathering with friends at your house, go to nice club, or even organize a nice trip to a country you like, to make it even more fun. Live your life to the fullest, and don't let bad moments ruin your future.

I would be really interested in learning your opinion on the matter, so feel free to comment or send me an email expressing your thoughts on divorce parties.

In Thursday's post I will share some ideas on how you could "shake-off" your divorce in Santorini and start your new life feeling fresh and happy.

Thank you for reading, and I wish you a lovely day! 

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